A New Hope

I won Blink 182's Dude Ranch in a game of poker when I was in 6th grade. It was the kind of poker game where the chips consisted of doritos, cereal, and anything else with value that we could find laying around. I went all in with my Sanyo calculator watch on a full house of aces over nines and my cousin called with this cd, which is still one of my favorite albums of all time.

Anyway, it's Sunday, so let's give a listen to "A New Hope," Blink's funny ode to Princess Leia.

	Blink 182 - A New Hope
	Found at skreemr.com

*By the way, have you seen the trailer for Sorority Row? What the hell happened to Carrie Fisher? She even sounds ugly.

Dead Man's Bones

At first glance it seems the Los Angeles duo Dead Man's Bones could either be a Misfits or Alkaline Trio knockoff. Then, without even listening, you see their influences listed as "Disney Haunted Mansion, Doo Wop, and 60s Girl Groups, and you really have to second guess what they could be.

Turns out their influences are pretty much accurate, as listening to their single "My Body's a Zombie for You," somehow makes me picture Elvis crooning inside a mansion haunted by children. And somehow this is a really good thing because I love this song and look forward to hearing more from these guys.

So check them out at their myspace, HERE. You'll be greeted by a creepy video promoting their forthcoming album, which is actually worth watching before playing their single.

It's probably also worth mentioning that the lead singer and producer/brainchild of Dead Man's Bones is actor Ryan Gosling, which I think makes this project all the more weird.

Reading Rainbow

Butterfly in the sky, I can go twice as high,Take a look, it's in a book — Reading Rainbow ...

Well folks, say goodbye to another one of my childhood favorites. The PBS Series Reading Rainbow, hosted by Kunta Geordi LaVar Burton came to an end today, concluding a 26 year run as one of the network's most important programs. Thanks a lot, recession.

I loved Reading Rainbow as a kid, and I believe it aided in my ongoing love affair with reading. But even back then I think I appreciated the irony involved when kids would watch it so they didn't have to read the books the show introduced. Even LaVar Burton knows you can't win 'em all.

Reading Rainbow, you will be missed. But you don't have to take my word for it...

Reading Rainbow Theme via Retrojunk.com (link edited)

Okay, I didn't know the show was still on in 2009, but I sure hope they've updated the opening sequence since the last time I tuned in.

Passive Agressive Notes

Passive Agressive Notes is a website devoted mostly to notes left by someone to others who have wronged them in some way, usually in a public place such as the office bathroom. The site describes its content as "painfully polite and hilariously hostile writings from shared spaces the world over."

This one came to me via the latest round of co-worker link sharing for boring work days. Enjoy.

Paper Planes

You can say I don't know anything about hip-hop, and maybe you're right. And if this website has taught us all anything it's that I just don't "get" popular music sometimes. But I swear to all that is holy that the best hip-hop song of the 2000s so far has got to be "Paper Planes" by Sri Lanken born, female rapper M.I.A.

The song's at least two years old by now,but for me it has stood the test of time.

	M.I.A - Paper Planes
	Found at skreemr.com

Story Time: Dr.Manhattan

Two years ago I had the opportunity to see my all-time favorite rock band play a scaled down acoustic show at one of the smaller, more intimate venues in Philadelphia called the North Star Bar. It was a rare event made even rarer by the fact that the band, Saves the Day, were recording some of their songs for an acoustic EP they'd later put out and also by the fact that their lead guitarist has since left the band, meaning it will probably never happen again.

Before Saves the Day could go on there were two opening acts. One of those acts, a power trio calling themselves Single File, was excellent. The other band, a group of 4 younger-seeming guys calling themselves Dr.Manhattan (yes, like the Watchmen character) were pretty good as well. They had a drummer, but they also had a big stand-alone bass drum that another band member would play during certain parts of songs, and I thought it sounded really cool and it was certainly different from anything I'd seen before. They were catchy and played music that really stood out against other stuff I was listening to at the time. I didn't think they needed to add anything crazy outside of the music to be likeable, but they insisted on running around stage acting like goofy kids, and I'll admit that's probably cool to some people, but I just didn't get it, and when they joked around it seemed a little "inside," especially for an opening act. I'm sure some people loved it. It was a young band having fun, but I was there for Saves the Day and they were taking up time. After the show I bought EPs from both supporting acts because I thought the music was excellent and I like supporting young bands, especially in environments like the North Star where they have to sell their own merchandise after their set so you can talk to them.

Later in the week I decided, as I sometimes do, to write a review about the show for a music website I frequent. This review that took me 5 minutes to write at work turned out to be the single most read piece I've ever contributed to the internet, however small that may be. It turns out bands--especially those just starting out-- like to read reviews about themselves on the internet. Who wouldn't? Only one band, Dr.Manhattan, took that review, and used the--admittedly--backhanded compliments I gave them to promote themselves on their MySpace page. It was a pretty smooth move on their part, and as a result I bought their LP when it came out. It's not bad.

To see what I mean, here is the Dr.Manhattan portion of my review from their myspace page. Feel free to read the comments, too, as some people took some pretty good shots at me. Here's one for free:
" you probably were too vibrant and energetic for his cold-black-blooded-soul"

Then check out their song, Big Chomper, Big Chomper, below:

	Dr. Manhattan - Big Chomper, Big Chomper
	Found at skreemr.com

Story Time:Lax Bros

Warning: This story contains sweeping generalizations.

Lacrosse is a sport rich white people invented* to feel good about their athleticism when they realized their success in real sports like basketball and football was starting to decrease. As such, it attracts all kinds of guys who couldn't hack it in other sports but desperately need a sport to obsess over and pretend to excel in, though nobody outside of their small legion of lacrosse buddies will ever care. These guys are "lax bros," and they are a special breed. I admit all of that despite it being my own most successful sport and my ticket to a nice college I would not have otherwise known about. I was not a lax bro.

I played D3 college lacrosse at a school expensive enough that the prep school lacrosse "Brantford Winstonworths" who could afford paying full tuition greatly outnumbered myself and the rest of the public school shmoes with federal assistance. Before college I had avoided these "lax bros" by attending a high school ghetto enough where nobody dared dressing or acting like those "bros" you see up top for fear of getting their asses kicked. However, I knew the bros existed from camps and summer leagues I attended out in the rich neighborhoods. After committing to college I was given the choice to "live with other lacrosse players" or not live with them. I knew without much thought that I couldn't share communal space with a lax bro, so I chose NO and took some crap for it at practice in the fall. The joke was on me, it seemed, since I was housed with two football players instead. But my roommates turned out to be smart, normal guys and I had a great couple of semesters as a result. For more information on what a "Lax bro" is and why I would avoid living with my teammates, keep reading.

A friend pointed me towards this video called The Ultimate Lax Bro which mocks the nature of most lacrosse players I've ever met. It's a little "inside" and not particularly funny, but that's because lacrosse bros are some of the worst human beings imaginable, so finding this video funny means you've had to endure their shenanigans. I feel like I made this video. Why didn't I?

Lax Bro Facts
Lax Bros look like the above picture: Fact (that's a real picture by the way, two real identical lax bros photographed in their natural habitat)
Lax Bros often have names like Brantford Winstonworth: Fact (my favorite is Xander Froworth)
They wear pastel colors when they go out to party: Fact
They bring their lacrosse stick almost everywhere: Fact
Wear their various practice jerseys everywhere: Fact
They have ridiculous hair and wear flat-billed hats: Fact
Flips flops?: 30 pairs
Wear "hey look at me" sunglasses, sometimes neon in color: Fact
Lax Bros love to "party": Fact
There's better than a 75% a lax bro went to prep school: Fact
Lax Bros, regardless of their skill, own multiple sticks: Fact
The list goes on...

*I am aware that native Americans technically "invented" lacrosse, but we're talking here about American lacrosse as it is experienced today. The indians never wore aviator sunglasses, and I'm pretty sure+ their games of lacrosse ended in death for the losing team.

+I'm not pretty sure at all.

Summer Movie Roundup

Just saw District 9 last night and it immediately went into my top 2 summer films of 2009. Why? Because it was different. For one there isn't an American actor in the thing, let alone an actor you've heard of, so it's not Hollywood-ized in the least. In fact, the lead, who does a tremendous job, is acting in his first ever film here. There is both a love angle and a racism motif, but you aren't beaten over the head with either of them. No, this is just a smart, new unpredictable thriller about aliens that aren't just one dimensional.

Hangover still beats it for many of these same kind of "different" reasons besides its hilarity, but it also gets the (+) for Galifankis' role. Here are my summer grades so far, graded on a curve:

The Hangover.....................A+
District 9............................A
Star Trek............................A-
Watchmen..........................B+
Harry Potter........................B-
Funny People......................C+
Transformers......................C
Year One.............................D
Night at the Museum 2........D-

To be added in the next few weeks: Inglorious Basterds, The Marc Pease Experience

Subterranean Homesale Blues

By now you've probably seen this news story about Bob Dylan being mistaken for a crazy person by police in New Jersey. You can also probably guess that every newspaper attempted to infuse Dylan lyrics into their witty headlines the day this was reported. For example, without any research you can safely assume that "Like a Complete Unknown" was used a lot that day.

Along similar lines, I've been enjoying this comments section of the official Stereogum report about the story. Each commenter is trying to one-up the next with Dylan referencing headlines about what happened. It's good for a few laughs. I stole this post's title from it, by the way.

The Hippos

The Hippos were a ska band that existed during the late 90s when all kinds of Weezer-inspired dork-rock bands were popping up all over the place, putting out one hit, and then disappearing. The difference between most of those fleeting bands and The Hippos were the horns, the moog, and the unparalleled fun-loving yet nerdy personality that made them good for at least one hit album called Heads Are Gonna Roll.

Hopefully these links below work. I loved their cover of "Always Something There to Remind Me."

hippos songs
Free mp3 download free music download

Mike Myers

If, like me, you heard that Mike Myers would be making the late night talk show rounds this week, but had no idea what he could possibly be promoting, I discovered the answer during the previews at a screening of Funny People last night. Let the above picture serve as your answer. I don't think he'll be hamming it up for this role, but you never know. Also, when was the last time Mike Myers played a part that didn't require a significant amount of costume? Has he ever played just a normal dude? Was it 1993's So I Married an Axe Murderer?

Funny People, by the way, turns out to be an ironic title. That makes two former SNL standouts taking a hiatus from comedy.

Baseball Stars

On vacation I found myself in a few situations of 20 to 30 minutes of downtime during which I had nothing productive to be doing since...I was on vacation. So I filled that time by downloading an original Nintendo emulator and playing perhaps the best baseball video game of all time, Baseball Stars. I thought of it as my own personal celebration of the game's 20th anniversary.

The game has held up so nicely because it was several years ahead of its time at release in 1989. For one, the game cartridge itself was one of only a handful at the time that had the ability to actually save your data so that you didn't have to start from scratch every time you wanted to play a new game. This meant the game allowed for seasons of 125 games in which 8 teams that could be user or cpu controlled could play and the game would keep several categories of statistics that would update every at-bat and still be there weeks into the season. It was also the first game to allow you to create a team with a name of your choosing or create a player which, for the first (and possibly last) time in video games could also be a girl. Players come with adjustable attributes like hitting, defense, speed, prestige, and luck which could be adjusted with money your team earned by winning games. Luck would determine the percentage of time a ball could be hit a few inches foul only to have the ump turn a blind eye and call it fair. Prestige, when added together between two opposing teams determined how much money you would make for winning the game. In addition to being able to create, the game also came with 8 stock teams to play as or against. Naturally in season-mode you would think to play the team called the Lovely Ladies 25 times to rack up a decent amount of spending cash because it would be easy to beat a team full of girls, but they were not the worst of the stock teams. That distinction belonged to a team called the Brave Warriors. However, beating the Brave Warriors brought in less cash. There was also a stock team called the American Dreams which fielded players named Babe, Dizzy, Hank, Joe, Sandy, and..well you get the point. Beating the American Dreams was tough to do without first beating up on lesser teams and earning enough cash to pump up your team's attributes.

Gameplay was nothing to scoff at either in 1989. Defense was surprisingly robust for an early baseball video game, giving you the ability to control any player on the field. Defensive attributes controlled the speed of your fielder's throws, so, for example, a catcher with poor defense could not easily throw out a base stealer with high amounts of speed. This made for a lot of infield hits when I hired a rookie girl named Ashley to play third base whose Defensive ability was 3/15. Batting for the first time in video games depended not only on timing but positioning too, as home runs could not simply be hit with a well timed swing but instead also demanded you hit the ball with the bat's sweet spot. In the outfield timing also played a role as fielders could attempt wall climbing stabs at potential homerun balls.

To this day I've never completed a full season, but during every attempt I've made since I was 8 I create a team called the Family All-Stars that includes myself and random members of my extended family and try to put them in positions that would somehow suit them if during their prime they were in peak physical condition such that they could compete in a professional baseball game. My Uncle who we call "Bear," for example is a catcher. Currently my bedridden stroke patient great uncle plays 2nd Base and leads the team in steals. My sister, whose in-game persona is called AngrySarah is the closer.

Tour Riders

How much can you really know about your favorite band until you've seen a list of all the crazy requests they make to venues while they're on the road?

For this reason I love The Smoking Gun's "Backstage" section, which features a running database of tour riders from various acts, old and new. The best, most redeeming riders are of course the funny ones, which are even sometimes worth reading front to back. I suggest checking out the riders of both Iggy Pop and the Stooges and then the Foo Fighters. For your information, Bob Dylan needs incandescent lighting.

When I'm a star the only extravagant request I'll have will be a few bowls of Chex Mix with everything but the chex removed.

Vacation!